Friday, May 20, 2011

NTDWL: Feeling Rapturous

Nothing to Do With Louisville... really.

All this talk about the Rapture on May 21...

I ain't buying it.  Hooey, I say.

But in case it isn't, Gentle Readers, thanks for reading my blog. For the first time.  For the past four years.

From what I understand, the fundamental Christians behind this May 21 prediction believe that a very select few, 3% of the world population-- all of whom, I assume, believe in "their" God-- will be whisked away to party with Jesus on Saturday.  And by "party with," I mean party sans alcohol, dancing, sex, drugs, rock and roll, and Obamacare.  The rest of us will live another six months or so, plagued by natural disasters, pestilence, riots, and turmoil.  Otherwise known as... your average week in 2011.

Then we all get sent to hell.

I say "the rest of us" because I don't really know any fundamental Christians or people who believe this rapture stuff.

BUT, if there IS a rapture, I believe those who will be raptured will NOT just be those folks who believe in the fundies' God.  If there is a rapture (and therefore a God), I believe that She/He will rapture only the truly, truly Good people in the world.

So, Grandma Lou and Michelle Jones, I will miss you very much come 6:01pm on May 21.  Love you both and God(seeing we know He/She exists at that point)speed on your voyage.

The rest of you? Hope y'all get good drugs for your pestilence.


John said...

Ooh, we have a confirmed time? 6:01 PM in which time zone? hehehehehe

M said...

John, I've heard it is 6pm in all time zones. A rolling rapture. So, New Zealand is our canary in a coal mine. If suddenly... oh, wait, I've been to New Zealand. I'm thinking not enough people will be raptured from there for people to even take notice. :) Anyway, we'll have advanced warning.

Michelle said...

Oh my sweet girl! Would that I could be a fraction as good as you think I am. That said this may be the sweetest compliment I've ever received. Thank you.